The Lost Art of School Report Writing

My kind of article. I would have been super at report writing, except today's parents are too thick to cotton on and would, anyway, be round to thump me.

Faithful readers who'll read this right thru can be counted on the head of one pin:

Prof Badders

Mountain Man [Lawks, what I would have given for a report by My Lord of the Nitekrü. Dude! Frame it for the jakes]

Lord Moss of Ma Wan

Hans Fletcher

Barry Greensted

David Li

Nevin Prakash

'Magpie' Mason

'Gary' Alban

Mary Visick

The only one I remember, that my father read out to me, went along the lines,

"Christopher keeps the table in an uproar. He likes to think of himself as a clever swine."

Dad said,

"Be careful. It's OK to be thought an ass or one who acts the clown, but when it's a case of 'You think you're a clever swine, don't you, Holmes?' Cave."

Which Dad of course pronounced cah-vay, bless him.