Carla's 'castle' for sale

Don't give a damn about the chateâu.

Show me da pics

Fairy-tale castle in Italy, for sale $28 million (£17m)

11th-century, Turin hills, renovated by Bruni’s grandfather, founder of Italian tyre manufacturer CEAT

Frescos and marble floors

Bruni lived there as a child, playing in 173 acres of parkland

(Yawn, who didn't?)

* The pulsing pampas of Tai Po

* The soaring scenics from Severn Road

* The shimmering breakers of Shek O

* The abacus stutter of Stanley Market ("Wait, can give you good price")

* Idyllic Island House more far

("Massah, helicopter come" ~ "Thank you, Lee".)

As if it needed announcing: Dad's files scattering from the chopper's upwind, marmalade jar spinning, everyone trying to hold down what we could grab, LOL

Grandeur of Castle Castagneto Po unrivalled in Northern Italy

Family sold the castle to Saudi Arabian billionaire

Show me the honey.

ALLEN ALERT: Cunning Woody corners Carla for next flick.

FASHION FACE-OFF:

What? Obama-mama besting La Carla?

Utter tosh. Fix!