ENNIS

I keep calling this cute 23-yr-old heptathlete *Glenys* Ennis - it's the rhymer in me - but her correct moniker is Jessica.

Apparently, there's some 'Sports Personality of the Year' argy-bargy over which everyone - bookies, in particular - gets hells lathered and opinionated.

I don't know nuffink about that but I *do* know that if the chiseled Ms Ennis doesn't absolutely cream the field, a lot of discerning Looksists will want to know why.

I mean, just look at the quasimodo competition:

Andys Flintoff (cricket) and Murray (Up for tennis, Miss Ennis? Now there's a Joan Hunter Dunn for the new century)

Fangio wannabe, Jenson Button (Who he?).

Not a pretty boy among 'em.

Whatever ... JE is my new best sexpot pin-up and I shall add to this page under the guise of being a hairy-chested sports fan.

Tadpole to Tiger

Bad Taste Comment ~ You have to feel a tinge of envy over boyfriend Andy: to be allowed even a respectful brush of those abs and wotsits must be worth any amount of ribbing dahn the boozer.

Bloke or Bird? At least there'll never be any doubt about my deliciosa Jess being a babelicious woman ~ unlike this beefy bloke who's being very cheeky trying to pull the femme card. Still, no accounting for tastes, I always say.

Complex process to check sex. Semen, ya? C'mon, how complex can it really be? But poor chap all the same, having to go thru all dis 'gender-verification' hullabaloo. (The names they come up with). And the quizzical looks over the G&Ts in the bar later ... the scowls from the other chicks when Semen sashays her way into the ladies loo?

Surface Clues: Listen before pre-judging.

Yes, A Secret Man (anag) - You have to laff at some of the clever stuff people get up to. And cry, as well, for the gauche handling of YASM's dilemma.