18 June 2006

cleaning

Critical Metrics

So I'm like giving the pool its first clean and it's a nice warm evening so I think of overcoming my cowardice and testing the waters.

It takes a while but I finally go in and it feels great.

I frolic about for a while until I've earned a drink and a brace of gaspers. I emerge and stroll down to the Rumpus Room where L is listening to my Bill Frisell and puzzling over the latest Athens News's Dilbert.

She knows I simultaneously hoot with laughter while going a whiter shade of pale at how close to the mark Scott Adams hits.

"You can't say this is funny," she says with a moue.

I read it and collapse foaming at the mouth with memories of The Big House and Rebecca and Rich and Hugo and all those other good people who'd know exactly  where the foam is coming from.

* Pointy-coiffed boss listening to Dilbert blah-blahing away.

* Blah blah blah, goes Dilbers, as the Boss thinks to hisself that it's 2pm and his brain has shut down for the afternoon.

Blah blah, drones on D

Pointy coiffed Boss to self: "This calls for some generic leadership", and instructs Dilbert,

"Do a cost-benefit analysis, get buy-in from all the key stakeholders, and track the critical metrics."

before retreating for a mythical confab call.

It's the precise-eared dialogue that had me shuddering.

Oh man, have we not all in our time endured just such jargon jarring alphabetic monstrosities?

For my next Greek exercise I have promised to translate it into Greek.

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